{"id":11638,"date":"2020-04-18T10:38:25","date_gmt":"2020-04-18T14:38:25","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/ioadvisory.com\/?p=11638"},"modified":"2020-05-03T15:24:49","modified_gmt":"2020-05-03T19:24:49","slug":"bouncing-back-from-pandemic-grief","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/ioadvisory.com\/blog\/bouncing-back-from-pandemic-grief\/","title":{"rendered":"Bouncing Back from the Pandemic"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>This has been a long, harrowing, exhausting time \u2013 and that\u2019s if you\u2019ve been fortunate enough to stay healthy and safe.<\/p>\n<p><a href=\"https:\/\/ioadvisory.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/04\/woman-in-white-long-sleeve-jacket-shopping-for-fruits-3962291-scaled.jpg\"><img decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignright wp-image-11642\" src=\"https:\/\/ioadvisory.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/04\/woman-in-white-long-sleeve-jacket-shopping-for-fruits-3962291-683x1024.jpg\" alt=\"woman shopping despite pandemic grief\" width=\"299\" height=\"448\" srcset=\"https:\/\/ioadvisory.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/04\/woman-in-white-long-sleeve-jacket-shopping-for-fruits-3962291-683x1024.jpg 683w, https:\/\/ioadvisory.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/04\/woman-in-white-long-sleeve-jacket-shopping-for-fruits-3962291-200x300.jpg 200w, https:\/\/ioadvisory.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/04\/woman-in-white-long-sleeve-jacket-shopping-for-fruits-3962291-768x1152.jpg 768w, https:\/\/ioadvisory.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/04\/woman-in-white-long-sleeve-jacket-shopping-for-fruits-3962291-1024x1536.jpg 1024w, https:\/\/ioadvisory.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/04\/woman-in-white-long-sleeve-jacket-shopping-for-fruits-3962291-1365x2048.jpg 1365w, https:\/\/ioadvisory.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/04\/woman-in-white-long-sleeve-jacket-shopping-for-fruits-3962291-333x500.jpg 333w, https:\/\/ioadvisory.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/04\/woman-in-white-long-sleeve-jacket-shopping-for-fruits-3962291-1067x1600.jpg 1067w, https:\/\/ioadvisory.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/04\/woman-in-white-long-sleeve-jacket-shopping-for-fruits-3962291-scaled.jpg 1707w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 299px) 100vw, 299px\" \/><\/a>Even if haven\u2019t been touched directly by the virus, your life has been changed in every way. The simplest tasks mean we have to stop and think. Picking up a quick bottle of wine or something for dinner on the way home is now a major undertaking that means putting on a mask, standing in line outside the store and trying to keep six feet away from the other shoppers.<\/p>\n<p><a href=\"https:\/\/ioadvisory.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/04\/photo-of-woman-leaning-on-window-3597096-scaled.jpg\"><img decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignleft wp-image-11643\" src=\"https:\/\/ioadvisory.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/04\/photo-of-woman-leaning-on-window-3597096-1024x683.jpg\" alt=\"woman in window coping with pandemic grief\" width=\"280\" height=\"187\" srcset=\"https:\/\/ioadvisory.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/04\/photo-of-woman-leaning-on-window-3597096-1024x683.jpg 1024w, https:\/\/ioadvisory.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/04\/photo-of-woman-leaning-on-window-3597096-300x200.jpg 300w, https:\/\/ioadvisory.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/04\/photo-of-woman-leaning-on-window-3597096-768x512.jpg 768w, https:\/\/ioadvisory.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/04\/photo-of-woman-leaning-on-window-3597096-1536x1024.jpg 1536w, https:\/\/ioadvisory.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/04\/photo-of-woman-leaning-on-window-3597096-2048x1365.jpg 2048w, https:\/\/ioadvisory.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/04\/photo-of-woman-leaning-on-window-3597096-500x333.jpg 500w, https:\/\/ioadvisory.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/04\/photo-of-woman-leaning-on-window-3597096-1600x1067.jpg 1600w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 280px) 100vw, 280px\" \/><\/a>Chances are, you\u2019re feeling worn out, or worse.<\/p>\n<p>But this will pass, and the end is in sight. In Ontario, the state of emergency is set to end on May 12, 2020 <em>(assuming that we have &#8216;flattened the curve&#8217; and the public health experts deem it safe to start easing the restrictions)<\/em>. And while things may never go back to completely normal, the day will come when we go back to something close to normal.<\/p>\n<p>We are sure to emerge from this feeling like we\u2019re coming out of hibernation: a little fuzzy-headed, a little disoriented.<\/p>\n<p>Here are some suggestions for bouncing back.<\/p>\n<p><strong>\u00a0<\/strong><\/p>\n<p><strong>Acknowledge Your Feelings<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>What\u2019s going on right now is serious. What many of us are feeling is more than regular sadness and fear &#8212; it\u2019s pandemic grief.<\/p>\n<p>David Kessler is considered the world\u2019s foremost expert on grief.\u00a0 In this <a href=\"https:\/\/hbr.org\/2020\/03\/that-discomfort-youre-feeling-is-grief\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">article<\/a> in Harvard Business Review he explains:<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: center;\"><em>Our primitive mind knows something bad is happening, but you can\u2019t see it. This breaks our sense of safety. We\u2019re feeling that loss of safety. I don\u2019t think we\u2019ve collectively lost our sense of general safety like this. Individually or as smaller groups, people have felt this. But all together, this is new. We are grieving on a micro and a macro level.<\/em><\/p>\n<p>Pandemic grief may have you losing focus, losing sleep, losing your appetite, having less patience, and crying \u2013 all normal responses.<\/p>\n<p><strong>\u00a0<\/strong><\/p>\n<p><strong>Be Gentle with Yourself <\/strong><\/p>\n<p><a href=\"https:\/\/ioadvisory.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/04\/man-using-android-smartphone-3206123-scaled.jpg\"><img decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignleft size-medium wp-image-11645\" src=\"https:\/\/ioadvisory.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/04\/man-using-android-smartphone-3206123-200x300.jpg\" alt=\"Man on phone coping with pandemic grief\" width=\"200\" height=\"300\" srcset=\"https:\/\/ioadvisory.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/04\/man-using-android-smartphone-3206123-200x300.jpg 200w, https:\/\/ioadvisory.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/04\/man-using-android-smartphone-3206123-684x1024.jpg 684w, https:\/\/ioadvisory.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/04\/man-using-android-smartphone-3206123-768x1150.jpg 768w, https:\/\/ioadvisory.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/04\/man-using-android-smartphone-3206123-1026x1536.jpg 1026w, https:\/\/ioadvisory.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/04\/man-using-android-smartphone-3206123-1368x2048.jpg 1368w, https:\/\/ioadvisory.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/04\/man-using-android-smartphone-3206123-334x500.jpg 334w, https:\/\/ioadvisory.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/04\/man-using-android-smartphone-3206123-1069x1600.jpg 1069w, https:\/\/ioadvisory.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/04\/man-using-android-smartphone-3206123-scaled.jpg 1710w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 200px) 100vw, 200px\" \/><\/a>Take the time to take care of yourself. Self-care such as breathing exercises, physical activity, yoga, meditation will help. Keep in touch with friends and family by phone and video. Getting a healthy amount of sleep each night is vital. A nourished body and healthy mind are key to getting back your strength and resilience after experiencing pandemic grief.<\/p>\n<p>I cover the topic of resilience in more detail in this earlier blog article: \u201c<a href=\"https:\/\/ioadvisory.com\/blog\/building-resilience-impact-career\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">Resilience: If you Don\u2019t Think You Have it, You Can Get it<\/a>.\u201d<\/p>\n<p><strong>\u00a0<\/strong><\/p>\n<p><strong>Be compassionate<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>Everyone is feeling fear and grief and it will show in different ways. Nerves are frayed; tempers may be short. It will help if you can recognize that everyone is on edge; everyone is grieving. Be patient with yourself and others.<\/p>\n<p><strong>\u00a0<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p><strong>Nothing is Normal. Don\u2019t Try Too Hard.<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>When the pandemic started I saw a lot of well-intended messages on social media about all the ways we could make the best of this time. Sure, a lockdown sounds like a great time to learn a new language, take up yoga and learn a new skill.<\/p>\n<p><a href=\"https:\/\/ioadvisory.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/04\/mona-lisa-protection-protect-virus-4113084-scaled.jpg\"><img decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignright wp-image-11644\" src=\"https:\/\/ioadvisory.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/04\/mona-lisa-protection-protect-virus-4113084-687x1024.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"426\" height=\"635\" srcset=\"https:\/\/ioadvisory.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/04\/mona-lisa-protection-protect-virus-4113084-687x1024.jpg 687w, https:\/\/ioadvisory.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/04\/mona-lisa-protection-protect-virus-4113084-201x300.jpg 201w, https:\/\/ioadvisory.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/04\/mona-lisa-protection-protect-virus-4113084-768x1145.jpg 768w, https:\/\/ioadvisory.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/04\/mona-lisa-protection-protect-virus-4113084-1031x1536.jpg 1031w, https:\/\/ioadvisory.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/04\/mona-lisa-protection-protect-virus-4113084-1374x2048.jpg 1374w, https:\/\/ioadvisory.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/04\/mona-lisa-protection-protect-virus-4113084-336x500.jpg 336w, https:\/\/ioadvisory.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/04\/mona-lisa-protection-protect-virus-4113084-1074x1600.jpg 1074w, https:\/\/ioadvisory.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/04\/mona-lisa-protection-protect-virus-4113084-scaled.jpg 1718w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 426px) 100vw, 426px\" \/><\/a>A writer friend of mine thought this would be a great time to finish her book. Again, it sounds like a great idea. But staying focussed is hard.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cI\u2019ve been beating myself up for not getting back to it, but the truth is, I have no energy for it,\u201d she says. \u201cI can\u2019t concentrate for long periods. I feel very little creativity right now.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Everything we knew has been shut down and taken away or put out of reach. Most of us probably haven\u2019t put a name to it. We\u2019re grieving for what we used to know as normal. So it\u2019s okay if you don\u2019t have the urge to learn how to ballroom dance, or learn Mandarin or bake a perfect souffl\u00e9. It\u2019s ok. You don\u2019t have to. Right now the best thing we can do is <em>whatever feels right<\/em>.<\/p>\n<p>Doing what feels right \u2013 taking care of your needs \u2013 is probably the best way to bounce back.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p><strong>When it\u2019s Time to Go Back to Work: Take it Slow<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>Working from home is not easy, and I\u2019d guess most people are looking forward to going back to work. When the time comes, the same suggestions apply. Don\u2019t try too hard. Take it slow. Honour your feelings as much as you can in your work situation.<\/p>\n<p>Don\u2019t be surprised that your routine doesn\u2019t just snap back into place. Everyone will be adjusting. Everyone will be coming out of a month(s) of seclusion. There may be elation, there may be confusion. There may be a lot of staring off into space while we try to get our bearings and recover from weeks of fear and sadness, and our collective pandemic grief.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p><strong>Reach Out for Help<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>Under normal circumstances, workplace issues were hard enough to deal with. Now, with so many complicating factors, it will be harder to focus.<\/p>\n<p><a href=\"https:\/\/ioadvisory.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/04\/Depositphotos_44848727_l-2015.jpg\"><img decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignleft wp-image-11650\" src=\"https:\/\/ioadvisory.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/04\/Depositphotos_44848727_l-2015-300x257.jpg\" alt=\"online therapy to cope with pandemic grief\" width=\"236\" height=\"202\" srcset=\"https:\/\/ioadvisory.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/04\/Depositphotos_44848727_l-2015-300x257.jpg 300w, https:\/\/ioadvisory.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/04\/Depositphotos_44848727_l-2015-1024x879.jpg 1024w, https:\/\/ioadvisory.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/04\/Depositphotos_44848727_l-2015-768x659.jpg 768w, https:\/\/ioadvisory.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/04\/Depositphotos_44848727_l-2015-1536x1318.jpg 1536w, https:\/\/ioadvisory.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/04\/Depositphotos_44848727_l-2015-500x429.jpg 500w, https:\/\/ioadvisory.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/04\/Depositphotos_44848727_l-2015-1600x1373.jpg 1600w, https:\/\/ioadvisory.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/04\/Depositphotos_44848727_l-2015.jpg 2000w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 236px) 100vw, 236px\" \/><\/a>If you\u2019ve suffered a loss or been sick with COVID or had to care for someone who was sick, this would be a good time to access your organization\u2019s EAP if you have one. If you\u2019re not sure what type of help is appropriate for your circumstances, this <a href=\"https:\/\/ioadvisory.com\/blog\/comparing-mental-health-specialists\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">previous guest blog<\/a> explains the difference between psychologists, psychiatrists, and psychotherapists.<\/p>\n<p>Career-wise, your plans have probably been derailed, because everyone\u2019s plans have been derailed.<\/p>\n<p>If you find yourself needing help getting your career on track, I can help.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>If you\u2019d like to discuss any of the issues addressed in this blog, I invite you to contact me privately by\u00a0<a href=\"https:\/\/ioadvisory.com\/blog\/appointments-career-coaching-counselling-dr-helen-ofosu\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">phone<\/a>\u00a0<em>(I offer a no-obligation, free 15-minute initial phone consultation)<\/em>,\u00a0<a href=\"mailto:%20helen@ioadvisory.com\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">email<\/a>,\u00a0<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/drheleno_ca\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">Twitter<\/a>,\u00a0<a href=\"https:\/\/www.linkedin.com\/in\/helenofosu\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">LinkedIn<\/a>, or\u00a0<a href=\"https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/IOAdvisoryServices\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">Facebook<\/a>.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>More than career coaching,\u00a0<em>it\u2019s career psychology<\/em>\u00ae.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p><a href=\"https:\/\/ioadvisory.com\/blog\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">I\/O Advisory Services<\/a>\u00a0\u2013 Building Resilient Careers and Organizations.\u2122<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Easily share this article using any of the social media icons below.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Even if haven\u2019t been touched directly by the virus, your life has been changed in every way. What many of us are feeling is more than regular sadness and fear &#8212; it\u2019s pandemic grief &#8230;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":11644,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[5,7,255],"tags":[32,317,326,378,379,170,236],"class_list":["post-11638","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-blog","category-career-advice","category-mental-health","tag-career-advice","tag-career-coaching","tag-career-counselling","tag-covid-19","tag-grief","tag-mental-health","tag-resilience"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v27.7 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/product\/yoast-seo-wordpress\/ -->\n<title>Bouncing Back from Pandemic Grief | I\/O Advisory Services Inc.<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"Even if haven\u2019t been touched directly by the virus, your life has been changed in every way. 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